The car was parked at the entrance of a remote village, the road was very muddy, and we took every step very carefully. The heavy luggage in my hand was as my heart.
Entering into a small courtyard with many twists and turns, before waiting for the luggage to drop, the two middle-aged men greeted them, kneeling in front of my grandfather, crying with a hoe and making a noise, which really surprised me. After some embarrassment, we were led into a dark old house, with a man lying on the ground.
"Big grandma," I called the old man with a faint hair in front of my eyes and choked, and she didn't respond, still curled up and quietly lying on a large bamboo plaque on the ground, staring at me with muddy eyes, without a face expression.
"She is Chuner's daughter!" A middle-aged woman next to her said loudly with her mouth close to her ears.
"... Chuner ... Oh ..." For a long while, the old man moved his lips, still expressionless, eyes dull.
Chuner, my father, the nephew of the old man, and I am the niece and granddaughter she never met. This is the second time I have returned to my ancestral home. It has been ten years since I first stepped into this door, and I have no memory of it. This time he went home to visit his relatives with his grandfather.
The room was smoky, the smell of incense was mixed with musty smell, the wooden rafters and the edges of the bricks were faintly visible, and the peeling paint on the corners exposed the hard loess inside. There was no light in the room, the door was the only entrance to the sun, and the incandescent lamp hanging from the top was already covered with cobwebs. Behind the neatly arranged offerings on the long table, is the grandpa who was embedded in the black photo frame not long ago. The shimmer of white wax reflected an old and kind face. Sadness permeates in this dark and small space.
"Do you let her lie like this?" Growled Grandpa.
"... she doesn't listen ..."
"... persuaded many times ..." The two or three women around explained bluntly.
The grandmother clenched her grandfather's hand tightly, her face filled with tears, and her mouth murmured, "Just go back ... he walks away ... he walks away ..."
Grandpa didn't talk, just patted her hand, then wiped her eyes quickly without blowing her face, and blown her nose aloud.
This is the first time in my memory I saw grandpa crying ...
Later I realized that the reason she insisted on lying in this room was to keep her husband's portrait. Over the age of 20, she has long been unable to take care of herself, and her daily life depends on her family. Grandpa has been buried for half a month, and she still refuses to leave, eating and drinking Lasa in this plaque. In the countryside, the tablets and portraits of the deceased cannot be moved at will. Several times the family carried her into the bedroom. The next day she found that she had climbed to the old house again, covered with mud, and had scratched the skin with her hands and feet.
I heard my grandfather said that when his grandmother was young, her ex-husband was misdiagnosed and died prematurely due to illness, leaving two young children and a pile of medical debts. Grandpa is a former husband's co-worker. When he couldn't bear to see her being affected, he secretly helped her take care of her children and repay her debts. The grandfather proposed to form a family with her. Although she was grateful, she was unwilling to drag the grandfather because she was a widow who was looked down upon. Grandpa didn't talk too much, and worked with her as always. When the farm is busy, take the time to help her transplant rice and harvest the grain; there is no rice or oil in the house, and she spends her own money to help her add it; the child goes to school to help her to raise tuition fees; the child works, looks for her from country to country The unit ... In this way, Grandpa waited silently in her own way, waiting for her youth, after a full twenty-six years! When her sons became home, she finally broke through the family ’s obstacles and worldly prejudices, resolutely Marry Grandpa. The marriage was low-key, but she was content. In a decade-long marriage, life was very poor. Her husband was transferred to work outside the home. She took on all the housework and farm work, as well as the indifference of her family and the disdain of the villagers, but she never complained and never shed a tear, even when she was tired or passed out. She often said to her sons, "Our family is at ease, and your dad is at ease. This is owed to him. How hard is it?"
When Grandpa told us these events, he looked very dignified and sighed. In his expression, there are memories, admiration, sadness, and emotion ...
After a few days at home, we are on our way home. Before I left, I came to the old house alone. The grandma still lay there quietly and fell asleep like a baby. I leaned down and clenched her dry, wrinkled hands and called out, "Big grandma!" She was still staring at me with no expression, no words, and even the hands in my palms were Cowardly.
I quietly got up and left without saying anything. In her world, only the tenderness of that decade can make her sleep like this. I think the decade of knowing and loving each other has been a century to them ...
Walking on the rugged road, turning around and looking back, the old house is getting farther and farther away from me, getting smaller and smaller, blurred, and obscured by the beauty of the countryside. However, my heart is bright, I know it is a spiritual spring of love, it has been deeply rooted in my heart, clear and clear, and has a long history ...